Rule 6: "If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them."
Rule 7: "Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes, and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room."
Rule 8: "Your school may have done away with winners and losers but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as many chances as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life."
Rule 9: "Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you 'find yourself'. Do that on your own time."
Rule 10: "Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs."
Rule 11: "Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one."